Food Aversions or a.k.a. Picky Eaters

Toe so good

Moms always complain about how their kids are picky eaters, it can be so frustrating and concerning.  You want your child to eat and eat healthy choices but picky eaters have a different plan. A picky eater with Sensory Processing Disorder (SPD) and or Autism (ASD) can be even more troubling.

My son is probably the pickiest eater I have ever dealt with. Honestly, most days I think he would sooner eat his own toes then eat meatballs or mac and cheese. Seriously, I have seen him eat a crayon no problem but roasted chicken, no can do. In order for E to eat something, especially a new food, he has to allow all his senses to approve the food item before he eats it. Its a process that he takes time with.

Here are the steps E goes takes before eating something.

Step 1: Looks at food
He stares at it from a few different angles. At this point, if he doesn't like the way it looks, it's on the floor or he starts screaming. He use to freak out over diced carrots.

Step 2: Touches food
If we manage to get to step two, he gages feel, temperature and texture. E tends to like food that are either really hot or cold and in the white or beige family of foods to touch. It will end up on floor or it passes to next step.

Step 3: Smell
So this is where E simply smells the food. Disapproves floor, approves next step.

Step 4: Taste
This is where my son will decide if he will bite the food. E takes a lick or simply touches his lip or tongue to the food. If it passes the test he will take a small bite. I mean small, bird size. Often the food ends up on the floor because he took so long to get to step 4 that the temperature is no longer how he wants it or he doesn't like the texture of the food item when chewed.

Right now E lives on Greek Yogurt (Banana only), bananas, smoothies with veggies snuck in, Keifer shakes (Strawberry only), almond milk, bread untoasted with Honey, bread with Nutella and Chocolate chip granola bars. Just recently he has stopped eating pizza, has tried chicken nuggets but they must be hot and banana with Nutella. He seems to like his things on the sweeter side. It's fairly healthy but I still feel like I could get him to eat more veggies and solid proteins. Perhaps that is every moms plight.

I long for the day that I can make a pot of Mac and Cheese, place it in front of my son and he eats it. Maybe not even all of it but a bite or two. In the meantime, we test out foods and hope for the best.

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Bells and Alarms

Paired sleeping for comfort

Bedtime in our house is a familiar routine to any other household with kids. You know, that mad frenzy to get the kids fed, washed and clothed for bed. You pray you can get it all done before 9 pm so you can tend to some house chores and maybe get a chance to shower before you crash into bed. It was a night just like so many others of wrestling to get kids down when I found myself thinking back on simpler times that I recalled something about E.

When E was just an infant, he always seemed to prefer to be swaddled for bed. He slept best that way. He seemed to love to be held close or snuggle with his twin sister in the crib. If you put him down alone and unswaddled, he would cry. We thought it was because he was colic. But as he approached the 1 year marker, he liked me to keep my hand on his back while he fell asleep in his crib. Many nights I stood at his crib side, my hand on his back. If I removed my hand he would cry or wake. So back my hand went on his back. I became a pro at alternating hands with out him feeling my switching of hands. It was exhausting. And God forbid his sister would wake, then I just had a cry fest on my hands.

Many times I thought of filling a dish glove with rice to lay on top of him to try and give myself a break. My concern was that some how that could hurt him, so I never did try it. Little did I know that weighted blankets would be in our near future.

Nightly headstands

After the year marker, he liked me to hold his hand or rub his feet. Eventually, he just wanted me in the room with him. He would stand on his head or ram his body against crib. So every night, I lay on the floor with the twins as they fall asleep.  Stopping E from potentially hurting himself. Some nights are more of a struggle then others but it is improving. No more body ramming or headstands since we give him plenty of sensory before bed. Melatonin helps him settle down a lot quicker, as well as a drop of essential oil on his pillow and woobi (security blanket) to help him focus on his breathing.

In any case, I thought back on this time and realized that he was seeking sensory stimulation even way back then. I also made the comparison in my mind in regards to my eldest son. Another sensory seeker from early on as well all though we are just now learning that this is what he too has. E, still loves a good tight hug so long as it's on his terms, loves joint compression, a good pillow squash and is slowly starting to enjoy the brushing. Both my boys do.

Bells and alarms.

I wonder why I didn't put it all together sooner. Was it lack of experience as a mom or denial? Perhaps both. My first son, N, met all his markers on time if not earlier then most kids. And E, my second, did not, so it was easier to notice some potential problems for him. So how did I miss N's sensory issues. Early on I though maybe there was something going on so I had the school evaluate him for potential behavioral problems at two but they thought he was just high energy. But there were signs, the late speech development, the covering of ears, the constant jumping and moving, the slamming his body into yours for hugs, the unexplained outbursts/fits, jumping from high heights, banging his toys down hard. Honestly, his hugs feel like a Mack truck is trying to run you down to the ground. Kisses that squash your face. Anxiety. I mean I should have known something earlier but I just figured because he is so bright that he was quirky. I LOVE quirky. And the professionals were telling me he was okay. My boys are healthy and happy, it's all a mom ever really wants to hear. But I kept pushing for answers.

So now at 5, N has been formally diagnosed with Sensory Processing Disorder and is now receiving Sensory Integration Therapy through Occupational Therapy. An answer and a solution.

Having these diagnosis' for my kids doesn't make life any less challenging but it gives us a great deal of explanation and motivation to get them the help they need to be successful in life. Do I still long for simpler times? Sometimes. But truthfully, they were never REALLY simple. Nothing ever is.

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Signs that Early Intervention is Working

Nearly a year ago my son lost all speech. He never said mama,  stopped saying daddy and rarely babbled. It's the reason we had him evaluated and sought out help for him even when others were saying "he's just a bit behind." Even our pediatrician didn't think anything was wrong but my gut new better. 

I would have given anything to be wrong but taking the time to prove it to myself turned out to be a good thing. I trusted my instinct, I wasn't wrong and though that was disappointing, we got him the early intervention and today something awesome happened. 

E's ABA therapist was over working with him on requests. 

ABA: Would you like a show E?

(He often gives signs or brief 1 or 2 word answers.)

E: No, I wan Wall-e and Eba. (No, I want Wall-e and Eva.)

I heard it clear as day. Had I not been in the room,  I wouldn't of believed it and more importantly, I wouldn't have heard it. I cried. My son had spoken his first true sentence and it was a spontaneous response. It was so awesome. 

Then E topped that. He knew what he had accomplished, I seen it in his face. I was so overwhelmed with emotion I had to walk away briefly. When I came back into his sight, he walked up to me and said "mama" and dipped his head. A sign that he wants affection. I kissed him and he raised his head and arms, now he was asking for a hug. As if he knew I needed it more then he wanted it. Either way, I happily obliged. It was a great moment. 

He went back down and back to his ABA to watch  Wall-e. We were beaming with pride. I still am.

He has since reverted back to his normal two to three word phrases but I know it's in there. His mind just needs more time to learn how to get it all out more consistently. 

All I can say is trust your instinct, fight for your kids, be their advocate and get them the help you think they need. In E's case, Early Intervention, Speech and ABA helped him get to this moment. I am thankful for his team every day. 

Just a note of thanks:

Mrs.Sallie you've helped me as a mother, a friend and family advocate. My son may not have received this help early on if it were not for you telling me to trust my thoughts. "A mother knows..." Thank you for supporting me and centering me as a mom. I know you will say it is your job to help but I know you go far beyond that. You are truly an angel on earth.❤️

Ms. Jill, I can't say enough about all you do to help and encourage E to speak. You are so great with him. You have become a very special part of our family and we are so grateful to have you as E's Speech Pathologist. We know E loves you just as much as we do. You helped make this happen. You Rock! 

Thanks for following and have a blessed day.

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