Is Sensory creating the behaviors?

On my last post I shared that my son E had a rough day. Everything was off about him and it seemed like everything was sending him on a tail spin. I mentioned that his OT had the look of being “Done” with him and I was right. This week was his last week with her. Allow me to share with you what happened.

E went to OT this Tuesday after last week kicking the OT in the mouth. I was prepared for her to tell me she was done with him. Thankfully she gave him another opportunity but not after speaking to me and letting me know her thoughts. The OT believes that E is not in control of himself. That his hyperactivity and a few extra undiagnosed labels, tossed in for good measure, OCD, ODD were getting in the way of his completing tasks. I know he has hyperactivity. That his mind and body are constantly moving but I just felt there was something more. Yes, his “Want” is a factor but was she looking at WHY it was playing such a role in his life. 

My thinking is that E is overstimulated in the OT environment. That he is in this small room with people coming in and out, the phone ringing, bins of toys that he can see what is inside, the parents outside in the waiting area with other children making noise, the door opening and closing, smells of an old house, etc. I share my thoughts with her and she gives him one last try. When his session was over she calls me in.

The OT begins to tell me that she sees E get frustrated and that she too gets frustrated because she can’t help him. He doesn’t do the work because he is hyper focused on other things. That he is constantly moving and that when she tried to force him to do work, he bit her leg. She told me she would no longer work with him until he is regulated on medication. UGH! Told you she was done. 

In any case, she proceeds to tell me why she can’t help him and that she is sorry but for the safety of herself and other kids she would have to pause care until he is medicated. Then tells me I should call the doctor and tell them it’s urgent despite my having an appointment already scheduled for mid August. I sign the second incident report and head home. 

He’s upset because I told him that he was not allowed to return anymore because he hurt her again. E kept saying “I will make it right, Mama” but I knew despite his wanting to, that he couldn’t. She was right about one thing, he was out of control but I don’t think it was just hyperactivity or any of those other things she added. Part of the reason we went to her was to address his sensory needs but she never focused on that. She wanted him to sit and do work. 

I’ve been reading this book called “Beyond Behavior” by Dr. Mona Delahooke and so much of the book sounds as though it was written about E. My son has his days and often I know that either his siblings or the world is setting him up for the kind of day he will have. Alone in his safe space, he is your typical kid. Shows no “behaviors” is kind, gentle and funny.  What if like the books says, the behaviors are just a symptom of what he is feeling. For example, E was having a great day until things started to change in his world. Add one sibling and he tends to be a bit louder but still good. Add say the TV and he becomes a bit jumpy. Then add the other sibling, specifically the brother with Autism and the clashing begins. Add my talking on the phone and the demands or climbing kick in. All those additions to his day lead to an off day because the world he is most comfortable in is ever changing.

What if every reaction E has, is a way of him comping with what goes on around him. I know that when I am uncomfortable, I often make inappropriate or corny jokes to hide how I feel. But it only makes it more awkward sometimes. What if his aggressive behaviors are simply a response to how he  is feeling? I’m still reading but it goes along with what I have been saying for the past two years, that it seems like something more is setting him off and that it is almost like a response to something. 

We have an appointment coming up with his Behavior Pediatrician soon and I will address this with her when we meet. I am excited about this because I feel like now that I know this is a possible answer,  that maybe I can help him and the world can see him one day the way I do.  

I’m going to keep reading and educating myself for the sake of my children. I am not looking to change them but to help them. I will keep working with them to find what works. I highly recommend the book for any parent who has an autistic child with Maladaptive behaviors and feels like their is something more to just unpreferred behaviors.  It’s just a tool to help raise discussions with doctors and therapists. The search for answers continues...

We are blessed for sure.

With love and dedication anything is possible!